i’m so hungry, but it’s in my best interests if i just ignore it.
i need to lose weight. i’ve got a stupid face. so maybe if i cut down on eating i’ll lose weight in my face and get a more defined jawline. i’ve cried tonight because i’m not happy with my looks. shan’t be posting anymore photographs. i don’t even know whether to go leeds meet-up because i’m afraid of what people will think of me.
yesterday. i met up with a girl that really really likes me. (and i like her too, but not as much as it would appear she likes me). we’ve met up before. we kissed. this time, we held hands and kissed quite abit. once i got home i went more or less straight away to a house party thing. where i went with another girl. and i held her hand all the home. and now, i’m thinking that the girl that really likes me doesn’t deserve someone like me, i’m a total cunt. i’ll only end up hurting her and that’s the last thing i want, because she’s so lovely. there’s another house party next friday, i will be making an appearance. i don’t know why i don’t learn.
one more thing
i bet you all think i’m a depressed little teenager who hates life,
you’re right.
goodnight x
today’s posts were brought to you by the letter C
C for cardiac arrest. i learnt how to deal with others undergoing this today, so if you’re ever planning on accidently stopping your heart any time soon. i’ll give you CPR and maybe save your life. i’ll try not to grope your breasts when i do it. x
i’ve sat and watched people get in and out of relationships frequently (in real-life and tumblr). while i’ve been single for a whole year. what am i doing wrong that makes me so unappealing to girls? my eyes are blood shot from all these late nights just contemplating how awful everything is. then i got to college with the bravest face possible and scrape through another dreadful day. i can’t keep this up for two years. i need a purpose.
things i love and what keep me going; the music on my iPod, pokemon, star wars, family guy, my family, callum cieciala, joe tiplady, sam shaw, james huson, tom hardwick, jordan maher, sushank bastola and everyone i follow on tumblr. x
so far, i’ve only posted text. all though, i might occasionally post songs or photos that either mean something to me. but other than that, i’m going to keep it traditional and post everything in word format. x
over the past couple of weeks my thoughts have been getting darker and darker. it’s gotten to the point where i’m such a downer to be around. beccy at college is like “you’re well depressed louis, cheer up, i love life me”. life is just the countdown to death beccy. as soon as we’re born, we start dying. what is the point in life really? having fun? what’s the point. all fun comes to an end. if i had a gun i would’ve killed myself by now. but i don’t. so i sit here and whine.
i hate it when people are walking in front of you in a street and they just stop walking. they could at least move over to the side to let other people past. but no, they’re so inconsiderate and selfish. i hate slow-walkers too, i just want to punch them in the back of the head.
haven’t really posted tonight on this, because i’ve been on the phone to a girl for nearly two hours. she’s lovely. currently watching season one of family guy. i attempted to clean my fred perry pumps and failed miserably. i used handwash and then made them less wet with a hair-dryer. then my grandmother showed me how to do them properly.
i can’t remember the last time i enjoyed college, today was once again poor. nothing good ever happens. it’s lost it’s novelty. i didn’t smoke today, i was quite proud of myself. i’m having southern fried chicken tonight, if you haven’t had it before: you’re missing out. i’m going to write my letter to alice soon (i promise). i need my hair cutting. here’s something that annoys me: when girls upload photos to myspace or whatever and caption it “woops, look at my boobs almost hanging out”. shut up, you meant to do it. you complete and utter tart.
one more thing
i’d like to thank all my new followers for taking an interest in this blog. today, i was sat in chemistry listening to my iPod, when a song came on and it really struck me. Panic At The Disco - New Perspective. because the chorus says exactly how i feel at this precise moment: stop and let me correct it, i want to live a life from a new perspective. i guess that’s what this blog is, my chance to change people’s opinions on me by showing my true side. i know it sounds really corny and you’ll just think “yeah whatever”, but i’m being serious. i do have a fair bit of bad rep on tumblr. i want to hush my haters and prove i’m not who they think i am. goodnight x
